EveryDay People 365           


  January 2014-Issue I

The Male Perspective 


Men don’t marry ‘cause there’s nothing in it for us.  What does marriage offer men today? Losing our friends, our respect, our space, our sex lives, our money and if by chance it all goes wrong, we lose our families. What do I get out of entering a legal binding contract with someone that could take my property, my pension, and half of my savings once the honeymoon period is over?  Men aren’t wimping out by being unmarried; they’re being smart. A woman gains once dude says “I do”. Now that I’ve lead with one side of it, let's look at another point of view.

Most men chose wrong reasons from the jump during their first marriages, point blank.  Marriage has evolved to the point where dudes can lose a lot. Friends shouldn't suffer if you set boundaries with your mate. If money is an issue, prenups are not only for the uber rich. Your lifestyle, nope!  She married you for you, not to be a house mouse stuck in her bra strap. You should be independent in the first place but to try and incorporate her into your life as she should you into hers. Your life will be enhanced and grow!  If we (men) stayed on point, she'd have no choice but stay on hers cause other women would see it and try to drive a wedge. The other woman could even be a "friend" of hers. We as a people need to re-examine the way marriage is supposed to be. 

Some people seem to worship wealth when marriage should be about the joining of two to make one strong and unbreakable unit. The financial penalties of marriage stem from Protestant views centuries ago with women and children being forced from homes and into the streets because the man/lord of the house wanted some strange! Those laws put into effect then could never imagine the world today as it is with women having somewhat equal rights and a safety net of social services.  Picking the right partner is paramount, choose wisely or suffer the consequences.

As a footnote, if you really want a blue print for finding a wife.  Pickup the Bible and reference Proverbs 31. Like Nas’ “Illmatic,” Gang Starr’s “Step in the Arena” and Wu-tang’s “36 Chambers”; Proverbs 31 will show you the light in putting a queen by your side.


Pictured above Chris Lewis aka Pac North 

Follow Chris on IG pacnorth 

                                                                                                                                                                                                                 Helen Smith, Ph.D., author of Men on Strike, quoted                                                                                                                             August 2018